Incels | ContraPoints

[Mendelssohn: String Quartet No. 6 in F minor,
III. Adagio] Voiceover: “Imagine how a woman feels.” “Imagine how soft and warm her skin feels. Imagine the sweet smell of her perfume. Imagine her tenderly pressing her soft lips
against yours. Imagine her letting you get on top of her
and insert your [bleep] inside her, softly moaning as it slides in. Imagine the walls of her tight, soft, warm
[bleep] wrapped around every inch of your [bleep]. Imagine her breathing getting heavier with
every thrust. Imagine her wrapping her arms and legs around
you, holding you as close as she possibly can and begging you to [bleep] inside her
as you release every ounce of your [bleep] into her. Then imagine the feeling of pure satisfaction
and peace that comes afterwards, and looking beside you to see a person that cares about
you and has accepted you in the most intimate way possible.” “You will never get to experience this because
your skeleton is too small or the bones in your face are not the proper shape.” “Have a nice day.” [Melancholic chill jazz] Hello boys. Let’s talk about bone structure. [Chill music] There’s something basically Soviet about
the way the Internet names things. Stalin had portmanteaus like agitprop, politburo,
and kompromat, and we have webinar, podcast, and incel, short for involuntary celibate. The word incel was invented in the late 90s
by a lonely bisexual called Alana, who created a website called Alana’s Involuntary
Celibacy Project that was essentially a safe space for people who just couldn’t get it
in. But in our own miserable moment of Internet
history, the word “incel” refers to a more specific community of mostly heterosexual
men, centered around forums like and r/braincels. This group has recently gotten a lot of bad
press because for the last few years they’ve been churning out mass murderers faster than
Marvel can make Avengers movies. But most incels aren’t violent killers. They’re just men who’ve formed an identity
around not getting laid. In this video I don’t want to mock incels
or lecture them or even sympathize with them. I just want to understand who they are and
why they’re like this. To start with, sometimes the best way to understand
a person’s world is to learn their language, and the language of the incels… well. You’ll see. 1st Base: Incelese Does it ever bother you that the word “women”
makes adult females sound just a little bit too human? Well incels have a solution to that. They’ve taken to calling women feeeeeemoooooids. The choice of vocabulary tells us how incels
think of women: not as sisters or mothers, and certainly not as autonomous people, but
as a kind of foreign, inscrutable object, comparable to a natural resource—unobtainium—to
which incels believe all men are entitled, and to which they feel they have been unjustly
denied. There’s a long tradition of nerdy men talking
about women in nerdily misogynistic ways. I’m reminded of famed rocket scientist Werner
von Braun’s remark about female astronauts: Voiceover: “We’re reserving 110 pounds
of payload for recreational equipment.” Which is not to say that alpha males are less
misogynistic than nerds, but simply that the nerds have a nerdy style of misogyny. Now “femoid” is about as neutral a term
as incels have for women and it’s only downhill from there. There’s the usual standbys: bitches, sluts,
whores, all conveying a searing resentment of female sexuality, the pinnacle of which
is represented by the bespoke incel coinage “roastie” which I’m sorry to inform
you refers to the incel belief that the human vulva become mutilated through repeated penetration
by different men—though not through repeated penetration by the same man interestingly—and
thereby come to resemble roast beef. Now by definition incels haven’t actually
observed any vaginas, but to incels anatomy is more a matter of metaphysical speculation
than crude science. Though if you ask me the right metaphor for
a veteran vag is not roast beef, but sour grapes. Of course, not all feeeemooooids are created
equal. There are various subspecies: [David Attenborough style voiceover] “The
Becky, or normie femoid is to be contrasted with the Stacy, or sexually desirable femoid,
whose distinguishing features include “makeup on point; Never works a day in her life; Naturally
curvy body gives men instant erections; big tits and ass show fertility.” Leave my buns alone you savages. The Stacy, naturally, has a male counterpoint,
whom incels call the Chad. [David Attenborough style voiceover] “A
Chad is a hunky alpha, whose hands are always prepared to grab nearby fertile pussy; he
has never heard a song in his entire life; he has a sloped forehead with a strong brow,
ram bow chin, strong jawline, flat occipital plate.” It must needs be remarked that the skull of
the Chad exhibiteth a brow ridge most pronounced whereas the skull of the virgin is most inadequate
in this regard, predisposing such specimens to an abject existence of lamentation and
cuckoldry. It’s time to talk about bone structure. According to a classic incel meme, [David Attenborough style voiceover] “The
difference between Chad and non-Chad is literally a few millimeters of bone.” I would like to propose a sociological theory. Foppington’s law: Once bigotry or self-loathing
permeate a given community, it is only a matter of time before deep metaphysical significance
is assigned to the shape of human skulls. Why skulls, you ask. Well, the best explanation I can come up with
is that a skull is inanimate and unchangeable. It’s therefore the perfect symbol of the
intrinsic and permanent characteristics that bigots like to assign to certain groups of
people. If you believe for example that a certain
race or gender is intellectually inferior, you can justify your belief by pointing to
the shape a skull and saying, well that’s the reason why, it’s just nature, there’s
nothing that can be done about it. And that is exactly the way incels think about
love and celibacy. Mankind is divided into two groups of people,
the Chads with the fuckable skulls and the incels whose bones come up a few millimeters
short. Corndog anyone? I’m really hungry. Of course it’s not just the skulls the
incels blame for their sexlessness. They have a whole dictionary of jargon explaining
the causes of involuntary celibacy. Heightcels are incel due to their inferior
stature. Whereas mentalcels can’t attract women because
of mental illness or autism, or they’re addicts and then called drugcels. Wristcels, on the other hand, are doomed by
their overly delicate wrists. Now, obsessing about your wrist size does
seem a little weird. Voiceover: “Oh yeah? Is it a little weird that the average dildo
has more girth than my wrist? Is it weird at all that some men have thicker
dicks than my wrist? But yeah, obviously ‘obsessing’ about
my tiny wrists that are smaller than even many women’s is completely irrational body
dysmorphia and the reason why no woman wants to be with me or even talk to me is my shitty
personality even though literal 80 IQ men who have nothing to talk about except who
won the game last night are still able to attract a loving partner.” …Interesting. A significant number of incels are not white,
in which case their unfuckability is attributed to race, and they are accordingly termed,
apologies in advance, blackcels, ricecels, currycels, and so on. Which is not to say all non-white men are
celibate. There are of course the occasional Chads of
color, with their superior skulls and towering stature, whom the incels have christened Tyrones,
Changs, and Chadpreets. I’m so sorry. So you can be incel because of your looks,
your height, your mind, or your race, but what unites them all is the conviction that
love and sex are forever out of reach. Unless of course you delusionally imagine
that you can “ascend,” that is escape your inceldom. If you falsely and pathetically believe that
there is any possibility of improvement, well, that makes you the lowest of the low, a sad
and sorry hopecel. Second base: The Red Pill So we have the building blocks of the incel
worldview: the Stacys, the Chads, the incels, and the normies. From these elements, incels have constructed
a theory of human nature and of sexuality, which they call the Red Pill. Incels share the Red Pill worldview with the
rest of the manosphere, that is, pick-up artists, men’s rights activists, and the voluntary
celibate community known as Men Going Their Own Way, abbreviated MGTOW. According to Red Pill theory, women are by
nature hypergamous. Hypergamy, new Greek for marrying above, refers
to the practice of seeking relationships with men above one’s social status, and also,
in incel usage, above one’s attractiveness. According to incels, physical attractiveness
is naturally distributed equally between the sexes. So if you were to assign numerical ratings
to attractiveness, as incels like to do, there would be about as many say 8/10 women as 8/10
men. Incels believe that in a just world, a 5/10
man would naturally wind up in a relationship with his looksmatch, that is, a 5/10 woman,
equivalently attractive to himself. But sadly, this just system has been ruined
by hypergamous women, who, regardless of their own attractiveness, are only interested in
dating Chad. Incels sometimes call this the 80/20 rule,
the idea that only the top 20% of men will ever be desired by women. Now since most heterosexual men do end up
in relationships with women, you might be raising your eyebrow at that idea. But incels have an explanation. According to the Red Pill theory, women often
pursue a mating strategy called alpha fux beta bux. This means that in her 20s a woman will, as
incels say, ride the cock carousel, sleeping with as many Chads as possible. But as she ages into her 30s she will settle
down with a beta normie, whom she’s not really attracted to, but whom she will use
for financial support, all the while continuously cuckolding him on the alpha cock carousel,
before inevitably abandoning him, taking him for everything he’s worth in a divorce settlement,
and running off to the Mediterranean with all the children and a new Chad boyfriend,
while the beta cuck is left behind to fester in alimony payments, solitude, and poverty. So the upshot of the Red Pill theory is that
for men, there are three possible outcomes. Either you’re an incel, doomed to a lifetime
of excruciating loneliness and resentment, or you’re a normie, destined to wind up
in a sexless marriage with an unfaithful wife, who will divorce you, win custody of the children
and run off will all your money. Or you could be an alpha—an independent,
promiscuous man who sleeps with lots of women and forms attachments to none of them. In the Red Pill philosophy there are two ways
to become alpha. The first is simply to be a Chad by nature. The second is to become a pick-up artist. Redpilled pick-up artists believe basically
the same things about women that incels believe, that they are hypergamous, duplicitous, and
fuckable, but not lovable. The difference is that pick-up artists are
not celibate, in fact they try to have sex with as many women as possible by following
a series of strategies and scripts known as “game” as described by the book of that
title, as well as by the red-pilled pick-up artist Roosh V, author of a book called— Bang, a new mascara from Benefit. So the tube is bomb, I am living. Let’s see what kind of wand it has. Ooo, it’s so big. I wonder what Roosh is up to lately. I bake my own bread. Yes I’m outing myself as a baker, as someone
who likes to cook. I’m not a woman. I am ultra masculine, as you can see, but
baking and cooking in general is a scientific thing. And men like scientific things. I used to be a scientist. Well, Roosh you know what? If it means you leave women alone then I hope
you enjoy your new life as an ultra-masculine baker— sorry, I mean bread scientist. So remember the red pill is the realization
that women are hypergamous by nature, 20% or less of men are really attractive to women,
dating is a sexual marketplace, and feminism is a pretext for enabling women to behave
however they want while consigning men to emasculation and impotence. The black pill is the additional realization
that one’s place in the sexual marketplace is genetically determined, that one is a permanent
virgin, that sex and relationships are forever out of reach, and hence that happiness is
impossible and there’s nothing one can do except Lie Down and Rot. The black pill is, essentially, dogmatic hopelessness
about dating and about life in general. It is the pinnacle of what psychotherapists
call catastrophizing: a cognitive distortion where anxiety or depression leads you to infer
apocalyptic conclusions from mundane setbacks and anxieties. For instance a catastrophizing person might
begin with the thought, oh no, I’m going to be late for work, and from there infer:
my boss is going to be angry, I’m going to lose my job, I’m not going to able to
get another job, I’m going to be unemployed forever, my family will starve, oh god we’re
all going to die. Each step in the sequence is sort of plausible,
but the leap from step one to step seven is completely absurd. This is exactly how the black pill works. You start with experiences of rejection and
isolation. From there you infer that you are unattractive
to women, that you will never be attractive to any woman, that you will be forever alone,
that you will always be unhappy, that women did this to you, that feminism empowered women
to do this to you, that the social trends that made this possible are only getting worse,
that humanity itself is doomed and your only option is to lie down and rot. Of course not all incels take things quite
so far, but a lot of them do. On incel forms suicidal ideation is very common,
and posts are often tagged “sui fuel” or “rope fuel” meaning that they make
you want to kill yourself, usually because they’re reminders of how hopeless the incel
situation is, or how devastating it is that incels are missing out on the incredible bliss
of sex and romance. Now if you suggest to incels that posting
sui fuel on forums already populated with lonely and depressed people is maybe not the most responsible idea, they usually say that ah it’s just dark humor, it’s just a cope, throw
us a bone here. But a lot of the suicidal stuff shows no signs
of humor, and it’s common to see people express pretty extreme states of depression,
which is not surprising, since hopelessness is the logical conclusion of the black pill
worldview. One’s possibility for happiness is determined
by the genetics of height, frame, and facial bone structure, and if you don’t have these
gifts there’s no relief but to cope or rope. Now—it’s pretty tempting to just mom the
shit out of these kids. You want to grab them by their Black Ops t-shirts,
shake them a bit and tell them that there are millions of men with small wrists and
weak chins getting laid every day, that they’re their own worst enemies, that they need to
get off the computer, go outside, make some friends, stop hating women, get some hobbies,
and who knows maybe then they’ll develop a disposition that women find a little more
approachable. Essentially you want to tell them, clean your
room bucko. In fact for the young men in this demographic
who are receptive to that kind of advice, Jordan Peterson is probably helpful. Because he’s telling them a lot of what
they need to hear, and he’s kind of a sexist old man so they might actually listen. But most incels don’t want to hear this
kind of advice. In fact, they view it as essentially a microaggression. You are, in effect, chadsplaining their oppression
to them when you give basic advice like be more confident, take a shower, to people who
have already experienced a lifetime of rejection and isolation, and who believe they’ve already tried everything. So they despise this kind of advise, and devote
endless posts to bitterly mocking the futility and insensitivity of it. Voiceover: “Just go out to parties, bro!” “Instead of hating on women all day why
don’t you losers just try being confident like this average looking guy? Confidence is key.” “You incels need some hobbies. Try reading some books, women love INTELLIGENCE! It works for me bro!” “Aw, you just need to get out more.” ♪ No one knows what it’s like to be hated
♪ To incels, their worldview seems ironclad. It has built-in defenses against anyone who
would try to change their minds. So if you want to understand incels, and in
particular if you want to understand why their community produces so many mass murderers,
you have to understand that the black pill is more than the dogma that you can’t get
laid. It’s also the dogma that because you can’t
get laid, you can never be happy. So what we have on our hands here is more
than a bunch of angry Internet misogynists. It’s, at worst, a kind of a death cult,
complete with an eternal hell and an omnipotent enemy. And it’s not surprising that that state
of mind leads a few of them to conclude that since triumph is impossible why not try revenge? Third Base: Tinder is Garbage I know I said I wasn’t gonna sympathize
with incels, and I know they don’t want my sympathy anyway, and I know it’s bad praxis to sympathize with the devil— but on some level I can’t help it. The Internet is for introverts, so I’m sure
a lot of people watching this feel the same way. I bet some of you have been this guy. I’ve been this guy. So look, I’m gonna tell you something I’ve
never really come out about on this channel, so this is like a really vulnerable moment
for me, but I used to live as a man. And I’m not proud of that but I’m ready
to move on if you’re ready to forgive. I’m in the unusual situation of being a
woman who dates men who used to be a man who dates women. What kind of fucked up shit is that? Is that even allowed? Alright calm down lesbian stans I’m still
attracted to women, and those who lieth betwixt, cats, the inherent eroticism of the sea. [Mendelssohn, Hebrides Overture]
Voiceover: “Mmmm yeah. Don’t you just wanna get in there.” “Take me mommy!” But I have been on a heterosexual kick lately. “I gotta get my hetero on!” What I’m getting at is I’ve used Tinder
both as a man seeking women, and as a woman seeking men. And I think I that gives me some relevant experiences. When you’re a man the strategy is you’ve
gotta send a lot of messages because women get a lot of messages, and then you’ve just
gotta try to be less of an ogre than the other fuckboys. Whereas if you’re a woman, you get to lie
recumbent on your chaise longue and receive the inquiries. Let’s see how we’re doing here. How many men have liked me on Tinder? I’m paying $30 for this information so this
better be good. I have 2500 likes. That’s a lot of Baltimorean men who swiped
right on a tran. What a divine city! [Game show music] Awww that’s so nice of them to be interested
in me. Let’s see what kind of messages I got. DICK OR NO DICK? PRE-OP OR POST-OP? DID YOU CUT YOUR DICK OFF? Oh my god. I’m gonna cut it off, okay? Jesus. I will let you smash my pussy so so hard, if
you just be patient. it’s a whole process. That’s not a pussy, that’s a fuck hole. You’ll never know what it means to squeeze
life out of your sacred passage. Well, that’s true. I’m not squeezing any life out unless something
goes very seriously wrong. And I assure you that none of the passages
I have down there ever have been or ever will be sacred. Abigail leave my fuck hole out of this. When I first started using this app I was
messaging a guy who seemed super chill, he was gonna take me to a concert, and I was
like that seems like a lot for a first date but okay I’ll try it. 15 minutes after we agreed to that he sends me a message. “What color panties are you wearing? I would love to smell them.” …Can we get coffee first? The hell of it is, I probably would’ve let
him smell my panties. But this is a thing you bring up on the third
fuck. You don’t open with panty sniffing. Like the only point of in-app messaging is
for me to figure out if you’re gonna murder me, and you’re already fucking it up. So this is the experience of women on Tinder. We’re drowning in dick and most of it is
terrible. Not all, I do have some very sweet messages, and
I haven’t used this app in a couple months, so if I didn’t respond to you or if we didn’t
match, it’s not becaues I rejected you, it’s because I don’t like the app. People screenshot my profile and post it online, and they call me contrapoints in app, and
like— I’m just too famous for this shit. My life is hard. So girls, we do a lot of complaining about
the firing squad of bad dicks that’s constantly pointed at us on dating apps. But how would you feel if instead of that
you were just getting radio silence like the incels get? I can’t speak for other women, but personally,
I prefer the firing squad of dicks. You know. At least these pricks care enough about my
pussy to be an asshole about my dick. I feel sorry for men on dating apps I really
do. They have to deal with a lot of rejection,
and that must be difficult. And these apps are especially brutal to people
who aren’t photogenic. If you’re meeting people at a bar or a party,
you might strike up a conversation with someone you’re not initially physically attracted
to. But then maybe they’re super funny, or charming,
or maybe they’re attracted to me—and that’s an attractive quality in another
person that they appreciate how beautiful I am. But on Tinder, you’re just browsing a catalog
of faces, and gatekeeping who even gets to talk to you in the first place. Red-pillers have a really gross way of talking
about dating in terms of “sexual market value” but like, dating kind of is a marketplace,
or at least you can analyze it like one. And our culture is so visual, and these apps
are so picture-centered that bone structure, like it’s not the only thing that matters,
but it matters a great deal. And this is where I do have sympathy for the
incels, because as a trans woman I know what it’s like to obsess over millimeters of
bone. I had to interrupt work on this video to go
to a consultation for facial feminization surgery so that I can going to pay luxury
car amounts of money to shave off a few millimeters of bone here and there because it must needs
be remarked that the skull of the female exhibiteth a brow ridge less pronounced. I mean I’m just as obsessed with bone structure
as the goddamn incels, because I think certain parts of my face make me look like a man,
and I worry about it every day. We’re all obsessed with the bones honey. We all have bones inside us, we all love touching
bones. [sensual whispering] “You want to take a
measurement from the supraorbital ridge to the lambdoid suture, and multiply that figure
by pi to calculate what we call the Chad circumference.” Why is no one talking about the Chad circumference? 4th base: Just the tip There’s another way I think my experience
as a trans woman is relevant to the incel discussion, and that’s that I know delusional
self-loathing when I see it. I’m far from the first to point out that
the “supreme gentleman” incel mass murderer Eliot Rodger was, apart from his narcissistic
psychopath personality, an eminently bangable twink. Now I’m not gonna show you pictures of incels,
but on their forums they do sometimes post selfie threads. And you can’t say this on incel forums without
enraging them, but in confidence from one pretend clinician to another, let me tell
you that the truth about incels is that almost all of them are completely normal looking guys. But of course that’s not the feedback they
get from other incels. The feedback they get is that their chins
are weak, their hair is thin, their skin is garbage and there’s no hope whatsoever,
no woman will ever love them, they are truecels with no option but to lie down and rot. And the interesting thing is, those guys post selfies to those threads knowing that that’s the feedback that they’re gonna
get. So why? Why do they do it? Well, I’ll tell you a little story. There is a website on the Internet called that has a board called LGBT. A few years ago this was used mainly by the
25 gay men who actually like Milo Yiannopoulos, but recently it’s used mostly by “men”
who are entertaining the notion of becoming women, and by early transition trans women. So the board is jokingly called TTTT. Now I’ve recently moved beyond that first
stage of my transition, but the memory is still fresh, and let me tell you, it is a painful,
awkward, humiliating stage of life. So the trans women of TTTT are tragic, they’re
basically still in man mode, which is why they’re using 4chan, and I bring them up
because they remind me a lot of incels. For incels the core frustration is that they
can’t get laid. For TTTT it’s that they can’t pass as
female. Both groups post selfies knowing they’re
going to get brutal unconstructive feedback. And both groups have a weird vocabulary with
which to express their anxieties. For instance on TTTT a major piece of jargon
is hon, a slur used by trans women for other trans women, which basically means that you
look like a man in a dress, which is what every trans woman is afraid of. And there’s another commonality with incels
too, with all bigots and self-loathers, which if you’ve been paying attention, you’ve
already guessed. Voiceover: “You will never be seen as a
woman because of your head size. Have all the surgeries in the world, your
massive man noggin will stay the same.” “lel, this freak thinks he has very soft
facial features. His head is fucking huge, lel and the hons
on reddit are hugboxing him and telling him that there are women with big heads. No, there aren’t. There aren’t fucking women with heads as
big as that and ffs won’t change shit. You might as well repress. You transition with a man’s head. You will be clocked, you will be looked at
as a freak, you will never be seen as a legit woman. 100%” “THIS is why I am not transitioning. Thank you Skull-people for showing me the
way and that no matter what I do I will always be a manly man skull-wise. You saved me the embarrassment of being a
literal big-headed man in a dress. Tis evident the cranial vault of the autogynephile
be much more voluminous and the facial plane wider— It always comes back to the skulls. Every time. The other interesting thing about TTTT is
I used to get posted there a lot. For a while I had some stans on the board
who basically viewed me as inspiration. Yikes. Because of course that kind of post is frowned
upon. If I’m not looked at as a big-skulled manly
freak, if my transition is going well, that means that some of their transitions
might go well too, and that is an unacceptable conclusion for a community founded on self-loathing
and hopelessness. So it was necessary for the rest of the board
to explain why I didn’t pass, why I would never pass, and why anyone
who looked less good than me shouldn’t even fucking think about it. They shouldn’t transition at all,
they should just repress, they should lie down and rot. And I used to read this stuff all the time. Like I would specifically seek out threads about
me. Which might seem strange considering I had
hundreds of fans telling me I was a gorgeous goddess every day. So why did I turn away from that to intentionally
seek out this dismal den of hons talking about how my giant hon skull is clockable at a thousand
paces, and my voice sounds like a ridiculous muppet falsetto hybrid of Mickey Mouse and
Winnie the Pooh. Well basically there was part of my brain
that just simply refused to believe it when people told me I was gorgeous. And for semi-plausible reasons. A lot of trans people on the internet tell other trans
people they look gorgeous no matter what they look like. That’s where the word hon comes from. You look great hon. So what TTTT is saying about reddit hugboxing
is true to some extent. There is a kind of a priori and dogmatic flattery
that prevails in some trans spaces. So I came to regard all compliments as “everyone
is beautiful” politically correct cuckoldry. And there would be this thrill of going to
TTTT and reading other people saying what my deepest anxieties told me was really true. And that was always painful but there was
a kind of pleasure too. There was a rush. It’s exciting to burst out of the politically
correct bubble and say what you’re really thinking: that personality doesn’t matter
because big-skulled Chads get all the girls, that ContraPoints is a big-skulled hon with
a voice like nails on a chalkboard. And at first I justified the habit by telling
myself I was just doing research. I have to keep tabs on what the bigots are
saying, that’s simply my job. But soon I realized it wasn’t just research,
and it was infecting me away from the computer. This ridiculous vocabulary—hons, AGP—was
popping up in my head at unexpected times. It was really starting to color how I thought
about myself, and worse, it was starting to infect how I thought about other trans
women. And that’s the moment I realized I need
to stop looking at this stuff right now or I’m going to become a monster, and once
that happens it’s going to be very difficult to fix. This is exactly how the incel blackpill works. There’s something infectious about these
vocabularies. Like on the days I’ve been working on this
video, I’ll go out at night and these words just involuntarily show up in my thoughts. That bartender is such a Chad, he’s totally
height mogging that tiny cuck. And the tragic thing is some incels don’t
realize what this is doing to their minds until it’s too late. Voiceover: “Let’s face it; blackpills
are sui fuel, and a lot of us can’t handle them. I gleefully indulged in this subreddit the
moment I discovered it, since I loved uncovering secrets that society had been hiding from
me, but it has affected my mental health in a bad way. I made my first call to the suicide hotline
a few weeks ago, and I’ve never needed to do that before. I could always talk myself out of it through
logic, but my mind is ruined now.” This is a form of what psychologists are calling
digital self-harm, prototypically teens who leave themselves abusive
comments from sock-puppet accounts. But the more sophisticated adult version involves
intentionally seeking out abusive and disparaging comments about yourself made by other people. I have a long history of doing this, intentionally
looking for abusive comments, especially ones that cut to the core of my deepest insecurities
and fears. Why? I don’t know. Why do people cut themselves? Part of it is what we could call masochistic
epistemology: whatever hurts is true. I’ve recently gotten much better about
this. I haven’t been to any of the worst places
in a couple months, and my mental health is much improved. So, incels. I’m not going to respond to your worldview
like its an intellectual position worthy of rational debate. Because these ideas and arguments, you’re
not using them the way rational people use arguments. You’re using them as razor blades to abuse
yourselves. And I know because I’ve done the exact same
thing. The incel worldview is catastrophizing. It’s an anxious death spiral. And the solution to that has to be therapeutic,
not logical. A lot of you are lonely. You’ve been bullied and neglected. You feel left behind by society. But what you’re doing when you’re reading incel
forums, is you’re slowly internalizing a cruel and distorted way of looking at yourselves,
and at other people in your situation, and at women. And you’re forming mental habits that are
going to make it very difficult for you to live a happy life. So what you have to do is get off those forums
as fast as possible. I’m going to post a link in the description of
this video to instructions on how to block certain websites from your computer, because
for me, that’s what it took. 5th base: … anal So the incel reddit/transgender 4chan analogy
has a limit, and that limit is that for a significant subset of the incel community,
the primary hatred is not directed at themselves, but at women. And they really hate women. Like I’m basically a professional internet
bigotry scholar at this point, I look at this kind of stuff all the time, but researching
this video I was honestly kind of shocked by the intensity of misogyny on incel forums. I won’t show the worst of it but we’re
talking blaming women for rape, saying they deserve to be raped, calls for state-mandated
girlfriends and sex slaves, but most of all just a kind of generalized misinformed rage. Voiceover: “I hate women. I really do. Every time I look at them, my blood pressure
shoots through the roof. When they’re gabbing on the cell phone about
Paris Hilton. When they’re adjusting their lipstick and
taking up my time rifling through their stupid purse. When they whine to me about their period. When they blither on and on about some artist/film
director/musician nobody gives a flipping fuck about. When they cry and expect your personal sympathy. But most of all I hate them because they’re
smug hyperactive little bitches made that way by our shithole society. Look what uncontrolled feminism and the media
has done— Hi Stacy, it’s Tracy. Well I was at the mall with Amber, Heather,
Jenna, and Trish and we were talking about Paris Hilton, a very relevant cultural figure
in 2018. They live in this cartoon caricature world
where it’s easy to avoid thinking of women as fully human. And that’s where my sympathy runs dry. Because this kind of hatred just needs a spark
to turn to violence. So incels, I know you’re not gonna listen
to anything I say, and you’re just gonna say I’m a tranny and faggot and a degenerate,
and to that I say how dare you say things that are entirely
true. But also: volcel if you wouldn’t bitches. And I know you don’t listen to suggestions
about you could probably actually have healthy relationships. So no one can really reach you until you get
out of those forums and allow yourselves to be reached. But by way of a closing remark I guess I simply
invite you to consider that you don’t even need a warm body or a sex robot to satisfy
the erotic longing. You know when I was your age in 1975 every
teenage boy had a stratocaster in his bedroom [shredding] that was the outlet for his sexual
frustration. What I’m suggesting is the manosphere exists
because rock n roll is dead. But there’s other options. Think about eroticism of a rainstorm, the
clap of thunder, the rustle of the leaves, the steam rising off
the warm pavement [sniff]. And whether you’re a Chad, a Stacy, an
incel, or a hon, you can always return to the caress of our dark mother, the sea, whose
salty embrace envelops every contour of your naked body. [Mendelssohn, Hebrides Overture] Voiceover: “Whew is it hot in here or is
it just me?”

100 thoughts on “Incels | ContraPoints



  3. Wow that is a lot of bitterness and anti-humanism rolled in one …

    I know start to grasp the meaning of "heal the world" …

  4. I feel pity for incels. As an autistic woman I can relate to struggling with relationships. The thing I don’t understand is why they think anyone owes them sex. It’s sad to lack companionship and I’d love more sex too, but I don’t blame men for my struggles.,

  5. why tf would people put the pussy on pedestal? Not getting laid? great get a life, travel, read, do something productive. Getting a girl is not the end all be all, we got brains use them and don't just give into our animalistic instincts.

  6. Why do incels post selfies knowing they'll be told they are worthless and unfuckable? The same reason the alt right want to say they are hopeless oppressed by jews and the left, the same reason minorities want to be told they are hopelessly oppressed by white supremacy, the same reason women want to be told they are hopelessly oppressed by the patriarchy. If someone is told they are hopelessly oppressed by something well above and beyond their power, they don't have to take responsibility for their failures and for improving their life! And if there is one thing people in modern societies hate ,it's being reminded the vast majority of their shortcomings and unfulfilled goals are due to their own failures and lack of accepting responsibilities. Every one on every side on every end of society today has their own black pill, and it's to shift responsibility from their selves, and onto personally uncontrollable victimizers.

  7. excellent, excellent, excellent video (I'm a man of few words… in this case 2)

  8. Fuckin… i hate them… like… they somehow ruin so many communitys without even fucking trying… and you cant like blame a lot of then… cause like i imagine the majority are just like inducted into that way of fuckin livin… its fuuuuuuuucked.
    Okay rant over.

  9. Natalie, you are the absolute queen, a goddess sent from the heavens and beyond. lol jk Religion is bullshit, but you really are one of the brightest minds I have ever encountrered on youtube

  10. There are some things you got wrong in your video. If you'd be interested in talking to an incel i'm up for it. You seem like a reasonable person making a good video instead of just attacking us for no reason.

  11. It sucks that young men are still sold this image of male sexuality where everybody involved is obscenely physically attractive and their lives are completely centered around fucking as often as possible. The reason we are programmed as a species to seek sex at every opportunity is because in the past, people didn't get a lot of sexual opportunities and they could drop dead of some horrible disease or tragic accident at any moment. Add to that the fact that even if you were married and having children, half of them were unlikely to reach adulthood and you see why humans are so desperate to get laid at every opportunity. But those circumstances no longer exist except in the most destitute parts of the world. You don't have to center your life around sex to be happy.

  12. 4:40 Can we please appreciate how incels believe that the "average" woman looks like the hottest girl from your classroom?

  13. So,positivity raids to these boards? I wanna tell some people how cute they are

  14. I don't know what kind of pickup artists exist in other countries but how comes that every pick up artist in my country seems to think highly of women and not objectify them?

  15. I was born female, and I promise you I HAVE A HUGE HEAD. This shit looks like a fucking bobble head on my 5”1 body. Even men have told me I have a huge head and big forehead. Big head does not equal “masculine”. I know that wasn’t the focus of the video, but I just wanted to let any transgendered women know that having a “big head” doesn’t make you feminine. I know I am not transgendered so I cannot see everything from your view, but I’d hate to see someone not transition for the fear of their “big head”.

  16. I don't think there is any kind of ineerent hatred in incels. I just imagine that if a specific group of individuals use the "no" answer, countless times, for something a second group wants, it is only natural that people in the second group will have some kind of "grudge" against the first group. Like, that's human nature ^^" to dislike the cause of it's misery.

    PS: I'm not a incel. But I simpatize with them. And, as feminists you should do the same, since, if you think about it, the mechanism that I described above, which creates the incels grudge against woman is very similar of the mechanism that create your grudge against men. Think about it :3 All the irony and sarcasm you use against the incels here, works perfectly against you.

  17. My cousin is 5 4 and he has a 6 pack works really hard and is not ugly. Yet women want nothing to do with him. I hoesntly feel bad for him. Heightcels are hoesntly pretty sad it dating is ruthless to them

  18. Nah. It’s taking some people as example to define a group. We can do the same with the alphabet community. Or quote from any woman online forum. It doesn’t make you look smart. Although imbicels will say it will.

  19. Hiya gorgeous.
    Made a list of the benefits associated with your video:
    1) a bunch of quotable phrases on the topic of "incels" (which your more or less mentally constipated fanbase W I L L E N J O Y A L O T)
    2) you made some dough – heck, you made it by spewing bullshit but I encountered once an agender Canadian witch who claimed to have made a good income in the "panty-sniffing industry", so hooray for that piece-o'-crap capitalism
    3) you have managed to make me understand that my sole former half-reciprocating partner/girlfriend/frenemy/faiblesse is, well, pretty much as loathsome a human being as me. She likes your bullcrap.

    Moving on to more cactus-y things:
    – ever had your father tell you that "you can't even find a dumb broad to hold your hand on the street", or that fellas of your kind usually get married at old age to chicks that have an ace tier banging record?
    – have you enjoyed a near-lifetime of rejection, then, soon after your last rejection that almost had you paralyzed with depression, became fond of a half-reciprocating soulmate who admitted that "yeah, I might be kinda needy right now cuz I just broke up with someone, so I don't know what will happen in one or two months", then just gave you the silent treatment, then left you for another guy who had been abandoned by his girlfriend who was "such a total cunt", in your half-reciprocating partner's words?
    – I guess that terms like "mental health issues", "unrequited love", "despair" are way less entertaining than the self-made self-deprecating "incel" term and Philosophy planet cheapo discussions of, pffffft, dogmatic nihilism, color me amused. I wonder how many of your avid fans, eager to quote you, instead of giggling and circlejerking in joy over the lack of empathy and humanity in that particular segment (while calling incels "pieces of shit"), actually understand that we are not dealing with cases born for their own amusement? These individuals are not anti-social, they are too fond of society, stuck in its crap and that is precisely why they agglutinate and they lose all sense of the ridiculous. They are friggin' corpses nudging each other (talk about gallows humor). Otherwise they could make decent hermits, I guess. Or just, well, completely isolated criminal cases.
    – do you feel the common sense overload in your final thoughts? Sure, you stoic, sexy, funny thing, they just need to mellow out and enjoy the seawaves crashing against their blue balls. Because, just like a good deal of our feminine comrades, they understand that they can enjoy solitude at its fullest for a looooong time and then just suddenly bail out and choose to trip over the best-fitting dick. Once upon a time in the Zucker mountains, some dongs were eager to offer their services to some girl, and she replied, "sorry, guys, but men aren't that hard to get hold of. All you have is to whistle and the dicks will come to you." Words from a true spiritual grandchild of Louise Labe, also brimming with realism.
    – these social loners seldom, or never, rape. Perhaps they would abuse and rape and maim (maybe, they don't have the chance anyway), but it's all a world of woulds and no dids. Most of the time they just foam for the term of their natural lives, and sometimes they burst out and kill. I have friends who, unlike me, speak pretty nasty about many women but still have girlfriends – some of them always retain suspicions and are ready for a shitty scenario. They fear their girls might be looking sideways and they are looking sideways too. Call them "potcels". I, for one, am not fond of that demeanor and not interested in finding out if I am that kind of guy (cuz I haven't had the opportunity and will never have, get it?), and I am definitely less than interested in finding out if I have anything to give and/or if I am capable of receiving something.
    I just don't friggin' care anymore about tiresome tryouts and bipedal excuses. Still, had a good dose of disgust to unload here.

    As far as I'm concerned, your productions seem to be fruits yielded by a glitzy husk with an overgrown syrinx (kquean of hypersocial, sterile, pan-curious planks). Had an assload more fun looking at Guston or Dubuffet's works, or reading literary criticism on Beckett. Or just waiting for a big salty dump to sail into the unknown.

  20. What an unfortunate circumstance for the phrase "Thank you, skull-people, for showing me the way." to come about.

  21. "I'm not insecure in my manliness, I just like to bake bread because of s c i e n c e which is m a n l y"

  22. I came here from your interview with Ash Sankar. You are a cultural anthropologist even more than a psychologist IMO… Great video with sharp insights!

  23. If there ever comes to be a Contrapoints theme park, you better believe it's gonna have a cock carousel. It'll be right next to the corndog stand.

  24. Imagine being in your mid twenties and not having sex? I'll go crazy too lol

  25. 5:10 Wait, I fit half the criteria for the "virgin walk" 😨
    Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo, I'm going to be stuck as a half-virgin forever 😂

  26. I love how half of this video are literally just Internet jokes and the rest is just depressed guys on the internet

  27. Its not a shocker to anyone that you suffer from the mental problem known as transgenderism

  28. Am I the only one that thinks its sexist when someone unironically calls a woman a "7" or a "10" to refer to their desirability?

  29. Lotta of these leftists examining the internet right seem to miss the blackpill, redpilling is just basic stuff, it's pretty much common language now, making it pretty much meaningless, especially if you connect it to some many different groups. Redpill=/=Radicalization

  30. I probabbly 100% qualify as an incel and I have solely gotten my online information from 4chan since i was 16 and I have always found your videos repulsive but I ended up watching this one and contra, you aight

  31. This video has been approved by The World Phrenology Society
    The only authority on who's a Chad since 1796

  32. Being an incel is probably healthier then cutting your penis off and injecting hormones that will give you cancer

  33. Drinking habanero ginger root and spices in hot water and learning to appreciate tonal expression.

  34. these guys must be the type who lost their minds over that one quote from the beginning of the social network. "you are going to go through life thinking girls don't like you because you're a nerd. but I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that that isn't true. it'll be because you're an asshole."

  35. Have you seen Bronson (the movie0?
    It's tom hardly okay
    I feel like is the epiphany

  36. I didn't expect to leave this video ASMR-purring at a literal ocean.

    How this (not at all hidden) gem of a channel has remained hidden from me so long must be because I haven't hung out with my friends in so long because there is no way many of them don't watch this. They all purr at ocean sounds too.

  37. We need to have systems set up to help mentally ill people how to interact with others. That's the problem. As someone whose on the spectrum and from incels I guess a hopecel cause I don't prescribe to there dumbass world view but I can't get laid nonetheless. I want something to help me learn how to handle social situations better. That's all I need.

  38. Okay I have tons of things to say about this video because I tend to be an angry feminist towards Incels and you kinda helped me calm the f*ck down. So thank you for that. I'll just close w/ telling you I'm definitely going to use some of your sentences in songs O:)

  39. Interesting video. I'm binge watching your channel. The part where "one you stretch a brain, it will never go back like it was before". While I know ass is under the same rule (LOL), I think you can't just remove this words after you read them, just because "unlearn" is not a function of brain. There is nothing like a "delete a file" in the brain (I know the psi-2 limit of tononi-markram says you forgot after ~60 years, but this is not the point). The point is, there is no "unlearn" function. So basically, once you need to build reality, which is the main function of a brain, you want to built it all and complete, so you need to see also things you don't like. It's not masochism, I think is how the brain evolved for: if you need to build a useful reality into your brain, you need the genuine information about it, with no mediators. And "brutal" or "assaulting" looks like there is no mediator. So you are looking for brutal sentences just because you think they are lacking of mediators, straight to reality. Problem is, there is no "unlearn" in the brain, so that you get exposed to random brutality, mostly useless to build any useful reality in your brain, but you can't "unlearn" any of them… once you stretch your brain, it will never come back like before. Nice theorem, isn't it?

  40. the delivery of the line "my mind is ruined now" sent chills down my spine, so sad

  41. Incels are black pilled, not red pilled. Also, are you really ashamed that you used to be a man? Isn't that misandry?

  42. Transgender have higher chance to commit suicide than an incel. Just saying, because you was talking about self harming thinking.

  43. There was a survey a while back on one of these Incel things, asking what percentage of them had even asked a woman out. Like, ever. It was about 20%, so even the rejection is basically in their heads in many cases

  44. Is the image of the ocean and those rocks at the closing credits from the Azores? Have you been there?

  45. Holy crap your in baltimore and not to mention as a trans, interesting. Idk what to say to people like you but maybe an old video or a future one that can explain your feelings about the topic of being trans.

    (I know one personally is all)

  46. There's a pattern I've noticed from the pity advice women have given me here.
    1. All women are individualists who think differently.
    2. Just accept yourself, your life will radically change overnight and you'll never be sad or alone again.
    3. "Stop victimizing yourself"
    It's curious how similar all this pity advice is, like women don't want to be mean to incels, but at the same time hate our guts.

  47. 10:33 Wow. Do you know how Many Men in their 20s and 30s believe this Dichotomy? It's been preached to me for over a decade at least.

  48. 3 mil peak a boo's ,,,,, Holy shit almighty ! This world you know so much about is god dam fucked up !

  49. I would like to buy a "VOLCEL IF YOU WOULDN'T BITCHES" tshirt now, please. thank you.

  50. Brilliant. Simply Brilliant. Damn, and just as I thought it was safe to go back in the water, …

  51. After reading, I am convinced that all women, even my mother and sister, deserve to have their skulls brutally bashed in with a rock or beaten until they are quieted, generation after generation, after generation until they realize they are subservient to men as baby factories and cleaning/cooking machines.

  52. Am I the only one to see that in the excerpt read at the beginning, there is no care given at all to the woman's orgasm? The guy who wrote it visibly never had sex.

  53. 28, 072 Comments. Like I'm going to post anything meaningful with those eyes all over.

    I eat food sometimes and drink water. I also breathe.

  54. Is it not gender neutral?
    Was it not created by a gay woman first?
    Is it not just the left wing version of "degenerate"
    Also,women like andrea dworkin could be female incels,
    fat,ugly,no good quality DNA,pissed off at the universe
    about the deck the were dealt and allways hating on men,
    boys and male children.

  55. Imagine how a woman feels…

    Imagine the cold, pale skin. The rancid stench of her decaying flesh. The look of her very last expression of fear and horror stuck permanently and etched into your mind. Her blackened, sunken and glassy eyes. Her organs liquefying as the worms and maggots consume what remains of her. The very cells that once made a creature so vivacious and beautiful become the soil. Her once sturdy skeleton structure cracking and breaking down overtime. The orgasmic satisfaction of watching, smelling and feeling death so intimately.

    You will hopefully never do this because you are a normal person and are well adjusted enough to not be aroused by this. Have a good day!

  56. If you spend years of your life trying to get a girlfriend and get nowhere. That doesn't say women are bad, that say's that you're bad. I went through that and spent years veering closer and closer to inceldom. Until I realised that I was a bitter, boring, in joke obsessed nerd that paid 0 attention to his appearence. Women don't care about yourchin or wrist size. They care about how kind you are, if your sense of humour matches up and if you put any effort into looking nice and not because only looks matter but it's a good shorthand for how much you care about your own personal development. Breaking out of inceldom is easy but they don't want to do it because it's hard work and they should just be handed a relationship because they think they deserve one.

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