The Website is Down #1: Sales Guy vs. Web Dude


Come on you little bitches, let’s go. That’s right, oh, snap… Oh, not now.
Oh you so suck… Oh come on, oh… Fuck! Hello?
Web dude this is Chip at sales, what’s up man? Nothing, I’m working. What’s umm, what’s going on? Hey, you uh, you here in building 3? Yeah, I’m in building three.
Well why do I have to call an outside number to get to your desk? Look, I don’t want to get into an IP telephony
conversation with you right now… You pee telephony? Ha, I pee urine.
That’s a… That’s a good one. All right, so look dude, we’ve got problems.
The website’s down. I’m sorry, what?
The website is down. Blackhole, I can’t get to the thing. Fuck!
Yeah… Hold on… Well it looks like it’s up to me. Well… I rebooted my PC and it’s still that
way. How many times did you reboot?
Three man, you always tell me to do three. Well, umm, all right. It’s up, I mean I can
check to see if Apache is running. Apache is running.
I don’t know what this Apache is but uh… Either way, I’m still not able to get what I need.
– Oh, I can telnet to the port, you can get HTML, like it’s running. OK well, I’m, I’m still not able to get what
I’m looking for. Uh, Nancy said that you, you guys rebooted it last time. Do you want me to reboot the web server even though it’s running? I’m just saying that’s what Nancy said you guys did last time. OK? Well, I, I can reboot it now. It doesn’t make any sense to reboot something
that’s running. Ok, well, I’m just I’m saying what Nancy said, that you guys, you know, you guys rebooted it last time. Umm… You know I’m not, you know, I’m not saying
anything about you guys. I mean I don’t know. Sure, why not, let’s reboot it… I mean…
I mean it’s always fun to reboot a web server. I mean that’ll take fifteen minutes, so, you
know, I can get back to some other work I was doing. Uh, wait, something just happened.
Uh, I can’t get to the home page. What do you mean you can’t get to the home page? I just took it down. I just tried to get to the home page and I can’t get to it.
You could get to the home page before? Yeah, I was getting to the home page and now I can’t get to the home page. You told me the website was down. Ah, Fuck. So the website wasn’t down.
Uh, well, well maybe that’s not what I meant, Ok? The website’s down now. Whatever it’s called, the world wide web, the…
The Internet? The Internet?
It’s slow, everything is so slow. You don’t know the difference between the
Internet and our website? Nancy is your, is your web working?
I told you it wasn’t. I know, I know, I know. He rebooted the website.
What?! – He rebooted it. – Why?! Hello?
Uh, yeah this is Trevor. I work for the city of Arvada, population
ten thousand, and I was looking at our website
www.arvada.orgarvada-harvest-festival And I… I get this error message, page cannot
be displayed. Well, it’s because the website’s down.
Huh…? Oh my God.
Look, the sales guys upstairs took down the website …so we’re waiting for it to come back up.
And then I tried… I tried arvada-harvest-festivalpumpkin-patch
and that wasn’t on there, and I tried harvest-festivalbean-bag-race
and nothing’s coming up and I LITERALLY have the mayor breathing down
my neck right now so we need to get this back up uh…
Look, it should be back up by now, honestly. It’s called online, we gotta get this page online. Uh, uh all right Trevor, well, let me, you know, can I call you back when it’s up? You know what, call me back at this number.
Literally have the mayor breathing down my
neck, arvada-pumpkin-patch.org. OK. Check. All right, I’ll see you later. OK. It’s down because he rebooted it.
What an idiot. Why do you… Um, so what, say that again? Listen, uh, what was your name again, Chip?
Chip. I didn’t ask for him to do that.
Can you hold on for a second? Hello? Did you take down the website?
No! Well Nancy said you did. Oh, I mean yeah. Why the hell did you do that?
Well the sales guys… Well, didn’t you get my email about not taking
down the web server? Um, nn, no.
Well, I sent it to you. Well…
Hold on… ‘Cause I don’t see it. Well, uh… This is weird, I don’t see it here. OK, well maybe I didn’t send it to you.
Uh, yeah, ’cause seriously, you know, I didn’t get it Well, the email said “don’t take it down” because it won’t come back up without being powered off. Oh, crap.
Yeah, thanks a lot. Uh, I’m sorry. Fuck me, look… Chip? – Yeah. – Look… Ok, the website’s not coming up now because
you made me take it down in the wrong way. Uhh, OK?
I’m gonna have to get Laszlo to power it off. Can you hold on a minute?
All right. Fuckin’ Lazlo, come on. Hello Derrick you fucking idiot. What rack is the system in? – I’m sorry, what? What rack is the system in?
It’s in rack 5. Yeah he told me that you took down the system.
Yes, it was an accident. What did he tell me?
Just reboot it. You need the system rebooted?
Yes. Which one is it?
It’s gray, it’s on the, it’s like third down. The one, the, the, they’re all gray.
I know, it’s third down, you can see the gray on the bottom. You need which, it’s from the top or the bottom? From the top.
You tell me. It’s, Jesus…
You tell me. It’s gray…
I, I can’t hear anything. I know, shut up! It’s gray on the bottom.
From the bottom? It’s gray on the bottom.
It’s not on the bottom of the rack! On the top?
Yes! Oh.
You just powered off the Exchange server. I’ll do the top one now.
Oh my fucking God… OK, yeah I did both of them, so you should
be good. Oh!
Uh, later. Thanks a lot! Uh, I don’t know, I guess he didn’t take it down right. Chip.
Hey. Well you managed to take the email system down as well. Really? The email server? Well it doesn’t have anything to do with the
web serv… …he just shut off all our email.
That’s what he tried to do last time. Uh, OK.
Lazlo at the data center rebooted it when he was trying to fix the web server
that you asked me to take down, so… How many times?
How many times, what? How many times did he reboot it?
Once. Well I think you need to try a few more times.
Web dude, We’re having a quarterly sales call in 2 minutes. I need to get on the web site, or the Internet, or whatever. That’s why I called you in the first place. What’s your asset tag, Chip? Uh, the asset tag is 287JPC and the number 2. Is that P as in Paul?
That’s P as in Paul. Ok. Where do you get this, duh wuuw. Is this your desktop? Is the mouse moving? Hello! My mouse just moved!
OK, yeah.. Do that again. Oh my God you’re moving my
mouse! It’s Remote Desktop. What is your password?
Ah, it just the letter ‘a’. Just the letter ‘a’. All right?
Like apple. Are you looking at my desktop right now? Dude, how many programs do you have running? You, you’re totally overloading your box. That’s probably part of the reason.
Well, I use all these programs. But you know I got a lot of work to do during the day.
OK, can I close this? Woah! Woah! Hey! No-no-no! You want to save it?
No, no, I need to save this! Chip?
This is all my work! Look, you don’t need this stuff open.
I’m… that’s some research that I’m doing.
OK? You don’t, I mean all this needs taking…
You can’t close all my windows! OK? Closing that…
Web dude, web dude, you gotta slow down. Chip? AOL? Don’t use AOL! It’s dial up networking. Well how am I going get to the Internet without AOL? It, it, it’s broadband.
But I got like 4000 hours for free. It’s… We have a corporate OC3, it costs like a thousand dollars a month, so don’t use AOL. Can you carry over my hours? What? What is this? FUK U.
It’s my desktop. Wuh, the icons, they spell FUK U! and there’s a picture of a penis. Patricia did this when I took over her Computer. She wasn’t very happy. Holy crap. How long’s it been like that?
8 or 9 years Oh my God.
You know, I just got so used to it I didn’t want to change it. That’s fuckin’ awesome, hold on. Fuckin’ hell. All right, I’m taking a picture of this, hold on just a sec.
OK, so… I’m going to put this on Boing Boing.
Seriously though, I’ve got a like a meeting
in 5 minutes …so whatever we got to do to get, to get
my PC back up. Uh, This is going right onto Boing Boing.
Uh, What’s Boing Boing? Here’s the thing, this is a problem.
You can’t have people lookin’ at this, Ok. Arrange your icons by name…
Woah! Whoa no no! I can’t find anything! What do you mean? It’s alphabetical.
Oh man, I, I had everything exactly where I knew where it was. I knew that, th, that our website, our website was at the very tip of the penis. And now I don’t know where anything is. Well, umm
My Salesforce.com was on the right testicle. I’m not going to be able to find anything.
I got, got a meeting in 2 minutes and I need… I need the icons back the way they were.
Well I can’t go back. There’s no way to go back. You can’t arrange
them by penis. Oh my God. I’ll tell ya, every time I call
you tech support people, every fucking time, you guys,
you guys do something completely different, you know? You don’t fix the problem that I call about. You know, all I wanted was to get the website back. That’s all, that’s all I needed! Can you restore it? You said took a picture of it. Restore it. Well… Yeah I guess, I mean I could just make that
the background for your desktop. I don’t care what you have to do, whatever
you gotta do to get this thing back. I’ll say it probably won’t, won’t solve the
problem completely but.. Well, with the icons in the same spot, I’ll
be able to get to them. All right, so this is worse. Oh, wait..
I mean it’s just a picture of a desktop. OK, it’s perfect, it’s perfect. Hey, I gotta get into my meeting, so, you
know I, I, this is great. You, you good with it? ’cause…
No, no, this, this is fine, I can find everything. I can find everything, this is fine. All right so, I gotta go to the meeting. Uh…
You know thanks a lot web dude, I’m outta here. OK, bye.
Bye bye. Jesus, what a fuckin’ day.

100 thoughts on “The Website is Down #1: Sales Guy vs. Web Dude

  1. Oh man this is a blast from the past. Amazing how much more of this I understand than I did when I was 15.

  2. The part where he quickly deletes the DO NOT REBOOT THE WEBSERVER email from his boss's sent folder just cracks me up every time.

  3. "Its slow, everything is just slow" This phrase, I hear it so often I want to run my head through a wall.

  4. well a good IT guy should know that his users are mostly full of shit; he should have RDC'd into the sales guys desktop before messing with any server. but ofc that cuts into valuable halo time

  5. “They call it on-line, we need to get this thing on-line.”
    Something about that clueless demanding tone is just, ugh. Doesn’t know what he wants but he wants it anyway.

  6. "How many times did you reboot it?"
    "three man, you always told me to do it three"

    Can confirm this. Love doing this to users who are annoying.

  7. Is there a version higher than 480p? This is totally awesome and just revisited again after seeing it years ago. Think it's worth archiving but 480p? Guess that was high res when it came out?

  8. Like y más like jejjej saludis desde Cubaa pasa por mi canal plisss muaaa💋👌

  9. I´ve also received an email with similar text like .

    PLEASE DONT INSTALL THAT UPDATE!

    Then I rollbacked 😀

  10. I love how everyone in this is as vague and unhelpful as each other. Derrick doesn't do himself any favours with his antics. 😀

  11. This pretty much sums up my day there should be a law that prevents sales from direct contact with I.T.

  12. Why would you reboot a whole server instead of just restarting Apache?
    Also they should tagging the server so they know which one is which.

    I mean it's an amazing video! 😀 but the IT perspective is failing because of laziness.

  13. I watch this at least once a year. SALUTE to the creator 💯💯💯

  14. Even though the screens are up for a brief period of time, the attention to detail is amazing! The email titles, the programs used for the respective OS, fricken amazing! I know it's for visual comedic effect, the thing that struck me odd was two things; why would anyone run a desktop environment on a webserver and why wouldn't the web dude just restart the Apache service rather than rebooting the entire box? At least he greped the service to check it. Plus, remoting into the client's machine should have been the first course of action. I know, I know, it wouldn't advance the plot. Still great video!

  15. Watching in 2018 in the world of cloud devops and AI . If he makes a video now all he will do is play halo and raise support req with MS and amazon

  16. Ahaha this is still so awesome! Never going back to tech support, god damn it!
    Love the sigh at 2:46 when he reads the entire URL 😀

  17. Сука какой же это ор , столько лет прошло а я до сих пор ору с этого.

  18. THIS is what I do for a living…. It literally explains my job. 9 years later, and still relevant.

  19. Как жаль, что только 2-3 видео переведены
    Даже авто-субтитры дают сбой (из-за быстрой искаженной речи)

    Хотелось бы просто посмотреть такие видео с субтитрами, как сделали, например, с этой частью (1-й)

  20. I've never seen a penis desktop but it cracks me up everytime when people just drop ALL their crap on the desktop and call it organized.

  21. Love this clip every time I see it, and now I'll like yours and save so I can share it again…..

  22. You don’t know the difference between the internet and our website?!

  23. everytime I see this video it remembers me my old good times on my part time job. Hardware/sofware/network support for one small company one summer. Downloaded tons of movies, played games online(DSL while others don't, because we all had dial up at homes) all the time and worked on the stupid easy PC issues, because back in the 2002 there was small amount of people that knew restart can fix 90% of all issues. It was my best summer

  24. Wait, so, if Chip has all those windows open, does that mean he HASN'T, in fact, rebooted?

  25. 8:55 It's probably been 20 years and windows still can't arrange items by penis! wtf, microsoft.

  26. Where I worked back in those days it was this: People get angry as fk if you ask them stupid questions, even (especially?) when they're so stupid you have to ask stupid questions. We got a lot of "My PC won't boot" type questions. That this came up often enough to need its own special handling was a function of how dumb people are sometimes.

    We came up with a couple of foolproof ways to ask questions you could not ask. "Is your PC plugged in?" could get you fired or earn you a lifelong nemesis if it was the wrong manager and his PC was in fact plugged in.

    So: "I need to know what kind of power supply your PC has. Where it plugs into the computer, is it an "innie" or an "outtie". Does the cable have prongs on it, or are there prongs inside the receptacle?"

    Asking if their monitor was plugged in could also get you fired. "I need to know if your monitor has a 9-pin adapter or a 15-pin adapter. Go behind your PC and look at the cable and count the pins."

    If the response is that you get hung up on, then you know that they didn't have their power supply or monitor (whichever) plugged in. The beauty of this was they figure out that you think they're morons who don't know how to plug in a PC, but they can't DO anything because they were — on that day and in that limited sense — morons. Anyone can make a mistake like these — I've done dumber things than not checking if my own PC was plugged in — and some of those dumb things have fried motherboards or memory sticks.

    But these people are vindictive morons who will punish you for thinking they're morons. Until you prove to them that they are morons.

    MOST people actually get the point and say "OK, you really want me to check if I've forgot to plug it in, don't you?" To which you can say "I'm sorry, yeah. You just never know how some people react when you ask them that outright. So now that that's out of the way, go check to make sure it actually is actually plugged actually in. OK?"

  27. Anyone else have nostalgia seeing how good skype used to be before Microsoft times while seeing this video in 2019?

  28. "…but you had to go all Intern up in this, and you did it."

  29. When I first saw this (2009?) I thought it was legit Tech Support call until the person on the phone said they had Windows XP installed for "8-9 years" … which was impossible.

  30. What's with the chipmunk speak? I can hardly understand what the hell they're saying.

  31. Please remake it in good quality! I seem to recall when I saw it 20 years ago it was a lot better.

  32. I'll never forget where I saw this video. Semester 1, our first Cisco networking class in college (or might have been one of our linux classes, idk, I was stoned). Professor showed it to us and we were all fuckin dying. So to me, you're an absolute legend in IT. And to many others. Haha. This shit is comedy af.

  33. Should be required viewing for anyone working in IT. CONFIRMED CLASSIC

  34. 0:55 Can we all agree that his use of "fuck!" here was about the game and not this douche bags dilemma? Too funny!

  35. Has anybody tried to find out more about this video? Like where it's from, if there's more than just the 3 videos, if there will ever be more? I recall having thought out scenarios, but never having recorded them, but man oh man, I so totally should.

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